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  • Man, Cable TV Is Getting Good and Raunchy (Mr Skin Minute VIDEO)

    2h By Lex
    Premium cable television has become everything you'd hoped it could become if you were frustrated trying to beat off to the first fifty years of television. read more
  • Irina Shayk Is Throwing Pots and Having Bradley Cooper's Baby

    3h By Lex
    Irina Shayk is pregnant. Out of decorum, news outlets are refusing to state definitively that the baby belongs to Bradley Cooper who's been fucking Shayk for almost a year now. Though that decorum makes Shayk seem even sluttier. read more
  • Chelsea Handler Run Hide Fight

    3h By Lex
    The common through line of doleful celebrities lamenting the loss of Hillary Clinton is the intense focus of how the election results affected them personally. Less so how the Family First economic plan shall never be enacted. Whatever the hell that was. read…
  • Barbados Needs a Better Tourism Board (VIDEO)

    4h By Lex
    Barbados is celebrating its 50th year of Independence from British colonial rule. That's the day they finally told the English to leave, then promptly created four-color travel brochures reminding them how much they secretly liked fucking black chicks. read…
  • The Arquettes Are Starting A Charity

    9:50am By Matt Ralston
    From an outside perspective, Alexis Arquette seemed like a really annoying blowhard. She became obsessed with outing cloested gay celebrities while simultaneously having the closet AIDS. Given your shitty logic, you may have inflicted some harm on people, no?…
  • Scientology Isn't Kidding

    9:17am By Lex
    Scientology may be based on a series of Roger Ramjet cartoon plots, but they don't fuck around when it comes to protecting the name brand. Within moments of Leah Remini announcing her A&E Scientology documentary series, the Church produced a website to tell…
  • The Moon Ruined Buzz Aldrin

    Thu 1:26pm By Lex
    Walking on the moon as a relatively young man is like being captain of the football team and banging the hottest chick in high school. You've got a lifetime ahead of you and there's nowhere to go but down. Classic early peaking. read more
  • Oprah Winfrey Seems Like A Fucking Weirdo

    Thu 1:13pm By Matt Ralston
    Oprah Winfrey spackled a ton of makeup on and brought her gay husband and lesbian lover on the same vacation. Lacking basic self awareness, she also hired an overpaid photographer to document the whole thing. read more
  • Lindsay Lohan Shockingly Only 30

    Thu 12:35pm By Matt Ralston
    Lindsay Lohan is officially the youngest cougar on earth. It's almost like in porn where they only have teens and milfs. Certainly there should be an in between but apparently not. You just leap from one to the other. read more
  • Blac Chyna And Her Ass Strike Back And Shit Around The Web

    Thu 12:20pm By Michael Garcia
    Now that she isn't carrying Kardashian seed, Blac Chyna's ass is back in effect. read more
  • The Victoria's Secret Fashion Just Another Subjugation

    Thu 11:44am By Lex
    Once you insist that your hot chicks in their underwear party is a "celebration of world cultures", you open the door for a wider range of critcism than merely the kneejerk charge of sexism. Victoria's Secret ruined a bunch of perfectly good international…
  • Phoebe Price And Angelique Morgan Are Ruining Another Holiday

    Thu 10:33am By Lex
    These two arthritic super-villains continue to roam the streets of the fair city unabated. Cheap body suits, Daisy Dukes, wigs, and thongs that must certainly smell like bad hummus. Which also smells like good hummus which makes the product extremely…