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  • The Houghs Seem Like The Fun Mormons

    29 July 2014, 12:28 pm by: Lex

    Apparently, seeing Julianna Hough and Derek Hough dance in sequins is a thing as the brother and sister have been on tour this summer in cities where men are allowed to stare deep into their little sister’s vaginas without being arrested. The siblings have…
  • Sylvie van der Vaart in A Bikini

    29 July 2014, 11:56 am by: Lex

    Syvlie van der Vaart seems like one of those women men create in comic books. She’s not even van der Vaart anymore. That was the name of her pro soccer husband Rafael van der Vaart who dumped her last year after her chemotherapy left her unable to produce…
  • Music Protests R Kelly

    29 July 2014, 10:43 am by: Matt

    Two Ohio based bands have dropped out of The Fashion Meets Music Festival because one of the Festival headliners is underaged girl loving R Kelly. Saintseneca, a band as preachy as their new aged name, thought better than to share billing with Kelly: “We…
  • Gwen Stefani Bravely Nurses

    29 July 2014, 10:17 am by: Matt

    Gwen Stefani has joined the chorus of modes and celebrities taking a stand for public breastfeeding by traveling to their European vacation homes and nursing under the sun. In staunch opposition to the breastfeeding hotties is one guy in Idaho who writes…
  • Freddie Prinze Jr Angry At Life

    29 July 2014, 9:37 am by: Matt

    Freddie Prinze Jr talked a ton of shit about Kiefer Sutherland at Comic Con because the only other way to make headlines is vehicular homicide. Prinze apparently did not enjoy working with Kiefer on 24, and has since bombed every subsequent audition in a form…
  • The Gathering Of The Juggalos Isn’t Pretty (VIDEO)

    29 July 2014, 9:11 am by: Matt

    This guy’s name is Big LA and he was apparently more interesting than any of the meth rap at this year’s Gathering of the Juggalos. Big LA is part of a general crew of unsavory people headed up by Mike Busey who live together in a communal Orlando area…
  • Pamela Anderson’s Ass Crack Means Her Marriage Is Not Yet Over

    28 July 2014, 6:07 pm by: Lex

    It’s the ass shadow version of Punxsutawney Phil. When Pam Anderson and her new Jane Fonda hair flash crack, it means she’s giving her unemployed husband six more weeks to bang her before she finalizes the divorce proceedings. It’s a test. A solid…
  • Khloe Kardashian Re-Opens Her Vagina Today

    28 July 2014, 5:29 pm by: Lex

    Nobody said dating a Muslim rapper was going to be easy, but Khloe Kardashian never asked for easy. Khloe’s been respecting the Ramadan restrictions of her boyfriend French Montana these past month, including no sex of any kind, outside of whoever he’s…
  • Tulisa Contostavlos Punched a Blogger

    28 July 2014, 4:59 pm by: Lex

    Can we all agree that bloggers deserve special treatment like people in Corvettes with blue placards or Congressmen or really good looking women in low cut tops? Freedom of speech starts and stops with pasty pale white chubby sedentary men with pistachio…
  • Natasha Henstridge Bikini Pictures Look Different

    28 July 2014, 4:17 pm by: Lex

    I don’t remember Natasha lugging those enormous cans around in Species. That might’ve been a different movie. Oh, no, here comes the alien. Wait, she’s still coming. Now she’s breathing heavy. I think her tits hurt. I guess the lesson here is that when…

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