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  • The Crap We Missed – Thursday 10.23.14

    23 October 2014, 4:00 pm by: Photo Boy

    Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed that’s kind of a sausage fest and I’m not just talking about how Seth Rogen‘s torso was made, Joe Jonas‘ new concept restaurant, or how to make Ariana Grande‘s brother’s head explode with a simple invite.…
  • Teresa Giudice Got The ‘OITNB’ Prison, Doesn’t Want To Now

    23 October 2014, 2:48 pm by: The Superficial

    Yesterday, we learned that Teresa Giudice‘s crisis manager fired her after Teresa went behind her back and filed a request to serve her time at Danbury Federal Prison in Connecticut which was the inspiration for Orange Is The New Black. And according to TMZ,…
  • North West Will Have To Work For What She Wants

    23 October 2014, 2:00 pm by: Photo Boy

    Posted by Photo Boy The Superficial’s Theory of Kardashian, which states “Upon the opening of the mouth, utter bullshit shall spew forth until said mouth closes or is rendered unintelligible by oral processes related to the filming of interracial…
  • Mama June Is Dating A Convicted Child Molester

    23 October 2014, 12:44 pm by: The Superficial

    “Will this’n here help you catch more keeds? I love you!” Last month, we found out that somehow Sugar Bear done cheated on Mama June (I really stop joking about all of this as you’ll see in a minute.) because if Jon Gosselin has taught us anything,…
  • ‘Brazilian Candidate? Look At Me Topless In My Underwear!’

    23 October 2014, 11:38 am by: The Superficial

    Yesterday, Lindsay Lohan was all over the place after she tweeted then untweeted an endorsement for a Brazilian presidential candidate with ties to cocaine smuggling because of course. So what quicker way to change the subject than by posting a topless photo…
  • Brad Pitt Seems Like A Good Sport

    23 October 2014, 11:13 am by: The Superficial

    Full Disclosure: I’ve never watched an entire episode of Between Two Ferns. In fact, I think the only one I ever clicked on was the Natalie Portman one and bailed after a minute. And yet for some reason this morning, I decided to watch the new Brad Pitt…
  • Good Morning, Michelle Lewin, And Other News

    23 October 2014, 9:46 am by: The Superficial

    - Captain America‘s probably banging Minka Kelly again. - Jennifer Lopez is following in Britney Spears‘ footsteps. The Britney Spears. - These Girls Know How To Work A Dress - LeAnn Rimes will destroy Christmas now. - Toys R Us caved to the Florida…
  • ‘The Avengers: Age of Ultron’ Official Trailer Is Here And Good God

    23 October 2014, 8:21 am by: The Superficial

    So Marvel had made a private video for its girlfriend Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. to see next week, but this is the Internet, so somebody leaked that shit last night detonating millions of nerd boners who clearly have no respect for privacy. That wasn’t meant for…
  • The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 10.22.14

    22 October 2014, 3:30 pm by: Photo Boy

    Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed, an installment I’m not particularly proud of considering it has both Nicky and Paris Hilton in it. If this post was me in college it would be jolting awake right now, rolling over, checking for a pulse, thanking…
  • Lindsay Lohan Endorses Brazilian Politician With Chopper Full of Coke

    22 October 2014, 2:39 pm by: The Superficial

    In a now-deleted tweet, Lindsay Lohan endorsed Brazilian presidential candidate Aécio Neves yesterday because if there’s one person the people of South America look to for political advice, it’s Roja Diabla de la Whitenose, Holy Mother of DongBongs. And…
  • Tina Fey Just Burned Rob Schneider

    22 October 2014, 1:48 pm by: The Superficial

    Because Rob Schneider‘s film career really has no business existing, Tina Fey decided to point that out during her acceptance speech at the Elle Women In Hollywood Awards where she paid tribute to the late Jan Hooks who alongside Nora Dunn paved the way for…
  • ‘X-Men: Days of Future Past’ Really Was Just ‘Terminator 2′

    22 October 2014, 12:49 pm by: The Superficial

    Bryan Singer is apparently going to be a father via surrogate, but because I’ve seen enough Hollywood awful that I don’t even want to think about what’ll happen if that kid is a boy (“I do!” Shut up, Stephen Collins.), here’s the Honest Trailer for…
  • Kris Jenner Probably Shouldn’t Photoshop Other Celebrities

    22 October 2014, 12:04 pm by: The Superficial

    It’s no secret that the Kardashians Photoshop their Instagram pics to fuck and back. But since they always deny it, it’s fun to see them blatantly get caught doing it. Which is exactly what happened to Kris Jenner after she posted a shopped photo with…
  • Teresa Giudice Fired By Crisis Manager For Trying To Book Her Own Jail

    22 October 2014, 11:15 am by: The Superficial

    To catch everybody up, Teresa Giudice was sentenced to 15 months in prison for fraud. Her husband got 41 months, and the tears of their children will be reality fuel, but that’s not the most ridiculous part. The most ridiculous part is Teresa getting fired…
  • Shia LaBeouf’s A Metamodernist Christian Now

    22 October 2014, 10:44 am by: Photo Boy

    Posted by Photo Boy If you’re wondering what the fuck that headline means, let me get the answer right out of the way. Nothing. It means absolutely nothing other than it’s one of the rambling, navel-gazing responses Shia LaBeouf mouth-farted to Interview…
  • Good Morning, Maitland Ward, And Other News

    22 October 2014, 9:42 am by: The Superficial

    - Selena Gomez might be banging Orlando Bloom again. - Ryan Phillippe: “I’ve only made five good movies.” - Presenting The Internet’s Booty Hall of Fame - Dean McDermott used to jerk off to Tori Spelling when she was on 90210. - Adobe sides with…
  • The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 10.21.14

    21 October 2014, 4:30 pm by: Photo Boy

    Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed featuring the rest of the people who had their boobs and butts out, or were shit-faced drunk like Michelle Rodriguez at that Angel Ball thing. And fat Busta Rhymes. We’ve also got Jared Leto signaling to Terry…
  • Tori Spelling ‘Quarantined Like An Ebola Patient’

    21 October 2014, 3:49 pm by: The Superficial

    She’s probably pregnant again, so why buy new pics? JOURNALISM! Tori Spelling lives thousands of miles away from anyone with the Ebola virus, and I’m pretty confident she’s not walking around letting random strangers shit and bleed in her hands. On top…
  • Did Tyga Put A Baby In Kylie Jenner?

    21 October 2014, 3:11 pm by: The Superficial

    As more and more evidence points to Tyga dating Kylie Jenner, his Instagram followers have decided to call him a pedophile for dating a 17-year old, but apparently they just a jealous ass ho who wish he’d put a baby in them. Like he did with Kylie? Wait. Via…
  • Matthew McConaughey Said Some Stupid Shit About The Redskins

    21 October 2014, 1:41 pm by: The Superficial

    Matthew McConaughey is the cover interview for the new issue of GQ which is an incredible read for anyone who’s currently obsessed with the McConaissance to a fault like I am. (And, yes, he’s aware of the term: “It’s a cool word. It sounds good. It’s…
  • Hannibal Buress: Google ‘Bill Cosby Rape’

    21 October 2014, 12:07 pm by: The Superficial

    Earlier in the year, Tom Scocca wrote an awesome piece for Gawker reminding everyone that Bill Cosby has a history of serious rape allegations that’s been neatly swept under the rug despite being a matter of public record. A week later, one of Cosby’s…
  • Blake Lively’s Pregnant Body Won The Angel Ball

    21 October 2014, 10:56 am by: The Superficial

    Normally, pregnancy is God’s way of cursing woman for using their filthy vagina holes for sex, but sometimes it can result a in beautiful transformation instead of the Beast of the Apocalypse. And such is the case with Blake Lively who took time away from…
  • I’m Told This Is Renee Zellweger

    21 October 2014, 9:47 am by: The Superficial

    If someone asked me to describe Renee Zellweger for a police sketch artist, the first words out of my mouth would be, “Lemons. She ate all the lemons.” From there, I’d go into extensive detail about squinting, so let’s cut the shit, who’s this…
  • Good Morning, Colleen Shannon, And Other News

    21 October 2014, 9:11 am by: The Superficial

    - I have yet to hear one bad thing about Birdman. - Bethenny Frankel‘s mom seems nice. - Jenna Handed To You On A Silver Platter - Sean Hannity invited Russell Brand onto his show, then had security kick him out. - This is a link to penises wearing heels…
  • The Crap We Missed – Monday 10.20.14

    20 October 2014, 5:00 pm by: Photo Boy

    Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed that features Aunt Becky & DJ after a sweaty workout, Roman Polanski posing with monsters, and Antonio Sabato Jr.‘s penis, so exactly everything, in order, from my dream last night, except…*averts terrified eyes…
  • And Now Back To Celebrities: What Are They Doing With Their Vaginas?

    20 October 2014, 4:18 pm by: The Superficial

    After the depressing one-two punch (poor choice of words) of Stephen Collins getting off (and I did it again) scot-free and Ray Rice being reinstated next month, I thought we could use some lighter fare. So here’s Miley Cyrus doing wacky stuff with her vulva…
  • Ray Rice Could Be Reinstated Next Month

    20 October 2014, 3:17 pm by: The Superficial

    After TMZ published footage showing Ray Rice knocking his fiance out in an elevator which the NFL almost definitely saw, he was suspended indefinitely by the league after getting just a two-game suspension and a pat on the back from the Ravens. From there,…
  • Jena Malone Is Probably Batfleck’s Robin

    20 October 2014, 1:49 pm by: The Superficial

    So here’s what we know about Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice: It’s heavily influenced by The Dark Knight Returns. In The Dark Knight Returns, Robin is a redhead girl named Carrie Kelley. Jena Malone has red hair which is already way more information…
  • Jennifer Lopez Still Makes Videos With Fat Joe

    20 October 2014, 12:43 pm by: The Superficial

    For the rest of her natural life, Jennifer Lopez will never make a video that’s better than “Booty.” These are facts. However, that still won’t stop me from posting the new video for Fat Joe’s “Stressin” because there’s nothing more with the…
  • Kim Kardashian’s Endorsement Demands Are As Ridiculous As Her Ass

    20 October 2014, 11:31 am by: The Superficial

    Most, if not all, of Kim Kardashian‘s services can be purchased through Kris Jenner. And if you think that’s an exaggeration, here’s Kim accepting an Austrian businessman’s money to be his date to the 2014 Opera Ball in Vienna while engaged to Kanye…

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