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  • Elle Macpherson Carries A Urine Test Kit In Her Purse So She Can Constantly Test Her Piss

    28 April 2015, 4:09 am by: Allison

    If you dumped out my purse (purse, drawstring Crown Royal bag – same thing, really), you’d find the following: a wallet held together with nude dude bandaids, keys, reading glasses, a partially melted lip balm, a prayer card with a picture of my personal…
  • Hot Slut Of The Day!

    28 April 2015, 3:53 am by: Michael K

    Wanksy, my new favorite British artiste who has been painting short white dicks on the streets in Bury, Greater Manchester because he wants the city to finally fill the potholes. A mysterious artiste who is going by the name Wanksy is sick and tired of the…
  • Birthday Sluts

    28 April 2015, 1:00 am by: Michael K

    Drew and Jonathan Scott (37) Samuel Larson (24) Jenna Ushkowitz (29) Harry Shum Jr. (33) Jessica Alba (34) Alex Riley (34) Violent J (34) Nate Richert (37) Penelope Cruz (41) Eric Vale (41) Jorge Garcia (42) Elisabeth Rohm (42) Bridget Moynahan (44) Too Short…
  • Night Crumbs

    27 April 2015, 3:11 pm by: Michael K

    Dame St. Angie Jolie, James Haven (with his hypnotizing STAINS eyes covered) and Maddox strolled through LAX yesterday. Every time I see Maddox looking more grown than the last time I saw him, a white hair grows in my ear  - Lainey Gossip  Kim Richards is…
  • Uncle Jesse, You In Danger, Girl

    27 April 2015, 1:59 pm by: Michael K

    John Stamos better sleep on a floater in the middle of a pool full of holy water with crucifixes surrounding him and his body covered in polyester pajamas from KMart (the Olsens won’t get near anything that’s polyester and from KMart), because the Olsens…
  • Open Post: Hosted By CHARO (And Marie Osmond Too, I Guess)

    27 April 2015, 11:30 am by: Michael K

    You’re probably wondering where Marie Osmond is in that picture. Well, if you cover Charo, squint your eyes and stare real hard, you may be able to see Marie’s black scrub brush eyelashes. That’s what happens when someone makes the wrong move of posing…
  • Kim Kardashian Wants You To Know That Kim Kardashian Is Very Happy For Bruce Jenner

    27 April 2015, 9:59 am by: Allison

    I know this is a paused-at-the-right moment picture, but I like to think it’s also the same face Kim Kardashian makes whenever her kurrent husband Kanye West starts into a 2-hour long rant about fashion or she’s forced to remember anything about North West…
  • For Where Is The Royal Baby?

    27 April 2015, 9:46 am by: Michael K

    The Telegraph says that the fourth in line to the throne and Baby Prince George’s standby was supposed to be pulled out of Duchess Kate’s royal vagine last Thursday, but none of spent the day staring at the front door of the Lindo Wing (named after Auntie…
  • Vanilla Ice Says There’s Nothing Offensive About Adam Sandler’s Latest Movie

    27 April 2015, 8:08 am by: Allison

    The Ghost of Iggy Azalea Future Vanilla Ice, seen above dressed as Mark Twain’s AXE-spritzing Monster-chugging pimped-out stage coach-driving dirtbag brother Gary ‘Greazy G’ Twain (at least that’s I’m assuming) in Adam Sandler’s upcoming film The…
  • And Here’s 4 Minutes Of The Butterly Unicorn One Dragging Nick Cannon

    27 April 2015, 7:34 am by: Michael K

    It truly isn’t a picture of Mariah Carey unless you’re asking yourself, “Is that a picture of Mimi or a highly over-Photoshopped flyer for the Cowardly Lion’s drag debut as a JLo impersonator?” The ear walls of the lambs are covered in candy-coated…

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